no Dumaguete for the broke

This coming November 27-29, I planned to go to Dumaguete to visit a friend who is taking a master's degree in environmental journalism. Aside from seeing how he's doing there, I want to take a break and escape from the cruelty of the city. I want to clear my head for a little while because the pollution of the metro seems to cloud my better judgment these days -- no matter how much I try to filter the smog.

... come to think of it, I'm addicted to the smoke of cigarettes. I'm addicted to something that I know will cause my own undoing. I need some fresh air.

I wasn't sure about going on the trip at first but yesterday when I had researched about the flights during those planned dates and found the fares within my budget, my mind was made up. I'm taking the plane to Dumaguete on the 27th even if my mom will get mad at me, even if I will be broke for another two weeks, and even if I have to travel alone.

Presently, I searched the Net for the cheapest hotels in the area. I planned what time I will go to work on Friday before the flight and even requested a change of schedule to my boss. All I had to do was ask my friends if they want to come with me.

When I checked my supposed itinerary again last night, the fares have changed -- much to my dismay as it is to my surprise. I couldn't understand how the rates could have gone up in a matter of hours. Is it because fuel prices have just increased? Or -- as absurd as it may sound -- is it because of the number of hits my constant checking have generated? Whatever it is, it didn't make sense to me. And needless to say, I can't fly to Dumaguete simply because I can't afford to.

Once again, this capitalistic world taught me that money can't buy me happiness but it can take you places where happiness -- or peace of mind -- is found.

blog resurrection

After finally getting tired of posting blog rants on my multiply site, I have decided to revive this blog to share and have a virtual archive of my adventures.

I have done a lot of crazy stuff in recent months - most of it I owe to my first paycheck at work. And I just think it's gonna be a waste if I don't put my experiences on paper (err... cyberspace in this case).

Days from now, I will post what I've been up to from the time I was bumming around after graduation to my first few weeks at work - if I find the will to recall and write about it.

this house is in dire need of literacy

ah, yes. another one of my late-night writing escapades when everything seems to be beyond accomplishment. i think the struggle of writing and allowing myself to be distracted by irrelevant matters such as plurking or checking my multiply inbox begins the moment i sit down in front of my ancient desktop computer. the latter always wins my precious minutes. and then there goes another night wasted. tell me, why is it so hard to do what's right?

***

this afternoon, i had a breakthrough with how i interact with children. (i don't really hate kids. i just can't say i'm good with them. can you blame me? i'm an only child) i was reading a book for my reviews subject while my five-year-old cousin was playing The Sims on my computer. i marvelled at how she knows how to play god in a cyber world and how she knows how to boss around Flo in Diner Dash 4. and yet she's having a difficult time reading.

when i was at her age (this was around 1993. im not that old, damnit), i certainly didn't know how to play today's computer games let alone use a mouse because the only computers existing at that time operated on (if i'm not mistaken) a windows 1.1 OS. the screen displayed only black, white and every thinkable shade of grey. i played prince of persia and this under-the-sea game with only a keyboard. needless to say, if you put the five-year-old me in the current year, i would appear to be a complete computer dummy. but at least i know how to read. and unlike my math lessons, i always looked forward to reading sessions with my tutor.

so having realized this while i read and while my cousin was busy decorating her Sims home, i made a vow to teach my cousin how to read and make her enjoy reading as much as i did when i was a little kid.

i tend to get excited when i think i'm about to do something for the benefit of humanity (yes, i think i'm doing the world some good by sparing it another illiterate kid obsessed with dota or CS or the profanity they learn from playing those games), so i asked her over to my room and gave her my yellowing snoopy pocketbook. i told her to read it. a few minutes later, she came back and told me she can't read. so i helped her read it. seeing that she probably couldn't understand what the hell the lazy beagle and master charlie brown were talking about, i told her to get her leap pad books without the actual leap pad machine thing (cool stuff that helps kids how to read and spell and stuff). i thought it was going to be a piece of cake since she's already familiar with some words she learned from school. it wasn't. after two pages, i was exhausted. this was going to be hard work but i don't want to give up on her. (omg, i might just as well work for Kumon!)

***

i want my cousin to read. and i want her to cut the distractions that fry her brain instead of enriching it. perhaps i'm doing this to make myself realize that i, too, have to steer away from my preoccupations. i think i need to grow up and write for real.

snap

ok, enough drama. i want to write again.

oy ikaw. oo, ikaw!

marunong ka bang magsulat? ha? ha?

eh mag-drawing?

mahilig ka ba sa kodakan?

gusto mo ba ng sweldo?

malamang oo. kaya mag-apply ka na rin.

may bonus points ang gwapo. XD  joke.

family tree

of all the objects and metaphors in the world, why does a family have to be associated with a tree?

last night, i understood. that even if a branch withers and falls to the earth it came from, the other parts, though affected, must operate to sustain the tree.

champagne supernova

ok, hindi ko pa rin alam kung anong ibig sabihin niyan hanggang ngayon. pero nung pinakinggan ko yan kanina kasi bigla kong naisipan na gumawa ng playlist na para sa mga lecheng lalake sa buhay ko (refer to the playlist at my homepage), bigla na lang akong naluha. don't ask why 'cause i also don't know the reason. but the funny thing is that instead of remembering (a) boy/s while listening to the song, i was reminded of my friends.

maybe reading my friends' posts made me think about the three months we have left with each other's company. i can hardly believe that it has been four years already. sometimes i still feel like that sixteen-year-old goth-wannabe. but i know i've learned a lot from a number of people whom i have shared what i know (dahil B.I. ako) and have, in turn, shared what they knew (and their vices). most notable among them are my DS friends.

now i know that i managed to survive and live with the fact that im a fool for love because i have friends who always cheer me up. yes, we love to diss each other but i know we care about each other (bawal bastos. nag-eemote ako eh) i can't picture myself working and not seeing them everyday after three months. perhaps that's why i don't like to be with them all the time. i don't want to get too attached because im an emotional and sentimental crab. i have felt this way with a guy and another but i never thought i would feel this for my friends.

i was closer to them than any of my other groups of friends. maybe it's because we understood one another. i mean, when you open up an idea such as love or living there would be someone in the group who would agree with you or share something enlightening or debate with you. or maybe we're all just bitches in a unique way. i actually don't know how they managed to put up with my own bitchiness. and yet the title of the queen bitch of the group remains unknown. eh sino nga ba? haha. magandang debate yan.

pero sayang lang talaga yung opportunity na uminom last saturday. mapapainom na sana namin ni tina si jaycee at joycee kaso ayun, sarado na ang dapitan gate. badtrip. oh well, next time sana bago gumraduate. :)

champagne supernova... hmm... ano nga kaya yun?